Saturday, April 16, 2005

Cats

Okay so I made a website thru catster for Bear (am am just creating Molly and Ferg's pages) and I think he's already getting more hits than I am. Dammit.

I'm sitting my driver's licence test on Wednesday. Yes, I am nearly 30, and I do not know how to drive. Yes, I am aware this is ridiclous, and yes, I am aware that I have missed out on many opportunities because of it. I am quite nervous - but I think, without doing the challenge, I wouldn't even be attempting to sit it (after all I have to get to the gym somehow in winter - right?)

Thats how much I have changed in the last eight weeks. Its freaky.

I'm now trying to put together my story for the challenge - its pretty hard - I heard that making the judges cry is a good way to get a prize - but this isn't about the prizes (well maybe a little - I am a Leo after all), its about the results and the fact that I have changed my life around. Its not fully all the way round, but I reckon I'm on the path to kicking ass and getting where I want. After years of struggling and not really taking this seriously, suddenly I am.

There is a line. Its pretty long.

At one end - there's the old me - at my heaviest weight (breathe) 124.8 kilos - with a ciggy in one hand and a bourbon and coke in the other - just having scoffed down an entire pizza, garlic bread, chips and dessert - that mel doesn't walk anywhere - she doesn't exercise, and she gets out of breathe really fucking easily.

At the other end - there's the person I want to be - toned and confident, doesn't need to hide, her heart is healthy, and her pcos is gone.

About a third of the way away from the oldme - is me now. Lighter than the above weight - but aiming for 115 in the next four weeks. No ciggies, rarely drinks alcohol, goes to the gym around six times a week, rides her bike nearly every day - still struggles a little with food - manages to only eat two slices of the pizza now. Getting confident, looking healthier, and getting shape definition.

I'm thinking of posting before and after photos from the challenge. But I'm also pretty nervous about it.

I can't believe I posted my actual old weight. Fuck me. I am changing.

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