Monday - Week Eight

It seems crazy that the time is just flying by on this programme. I think people finally get it when I say 'It's not a diet, it is how normal people eat'. I (mostly) keep to my 1200 calorie limit, and I (try to) exercise 6 days a week. I track everything that goes into my mouth, including the sneaky bit of cake I ate today when I was feeling stressed. So my habits aren't perfect - and I don't expect to be perfect all the time. But I have learnt that if I eat that bit of cake, I need to account for it - by tracking the calories; and work it off - by exercising.

Given that I don't really feel like paying for a gym membership while we are trying to save as much money as we can for our honeymoon in March; I mostly work out using dvd's. Currently my favourite is Billy Blanks SOS (Sweat off the sizes); followed by Jillian Michaels 30 day shred. On Sunday I did both in a row, worked out for over an hour and burnt 400 calories. Today I just did 30 day shred and burnt 175.

I also use The Biggest Loser workouts (Bob makes me smile), and sometimes I do Jackie's Power Circuit, but she kind of scares me.

I forgot how much I like to feel the burn. The next day, even though I groan about sore muscles - I like it because I know it means something is happening. Same with sweat. As gross as it seems, feeling it running down your neck/in your hair, on your palms as you push another set through really makes me feel like I am achieving something.

My mum commented the other day on how I was looking good - and workmates have commented on my body changing. I can sort of see it but not really. On the 12wbt message boards someone posted they felt like they hadn't achieved much - but then decided to take photos to compare to the pre-season pics. She posted the pic of her back - then and now - and you could see the change. I think I might have to do the same thing. Although it won't be for public consumption  - I still find my body pretty horrifying - and I'm shocked at myself for not realising before how fat I had become. I mean, I know I have mirrors and could see by my clothing sizes, but its not the same when you are confronted with it - working through the issues that made me that way in the first place and admitting things to yourself that you haven't been able to - like my binge and emotional eating.

I feel like I have come a long way (baby), but I do have a long way to go. Fingers crossed I smash that 10 kilo goal on Wednesday, and then my next target is 10% of my body weight. Obviously if you are mathematical you can probably figure out how much I weigh(ed), but if you really want to know, just ask. I am proud of what I have achieved so far.

See you Wednesday!